Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Randomize