That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
