So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize