Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I think I sprained my soul last night
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
