Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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