we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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