Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
