She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Randomize
