watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Damn victory sex feels great
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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