My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
