what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
