Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
