I hate your face
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
