I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
