just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
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