I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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