i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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