I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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