ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
