I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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