people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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