no. you can't hotbox the world.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
