Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
