He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
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