he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
