roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
