he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
