So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
