I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
