And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
