I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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