great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I am one with the molecules
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
lol hangovers are for mortals.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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