I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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