We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
