Slut skills are useful in every country.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
