Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize