she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
