So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
