She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
