Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
