My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
