like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize