idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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