So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
