So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I just googled if crying burns calories
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
