More tranny stories later!
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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