is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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