he was CRYING into my vagina
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I am available for nakedness
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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