Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
The best revenge is premature balding
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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