About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
